A Backwards Kind of Reunion
by highflyer101
Summary: Quinn told Rachel what they both knew was going to happen. And after graduation, it did. But when Finn and Quinn hit a bump in the road, and he goes to London to 'find himself,' he does not count on finding Rachel Berry too.
1. Chapter 1

Rachel Berry never thought that she would be inspired to fall out of love with Finn Hudson. She certainly did not think that _Quinn Fabray _would inspire her to do so. Not that she was gay; she certainly felt for Finn at one time. Just not anymore.

So that was why she remade Rachel Berry, and learned to love herself again. She didn't need Finn, or Noah, or Jesse, or even Mr. Schue to tell her she was good anymore. It made her relaxed, and she started to give away some of her solos. And it felt really, really good to see the look on Tina's face when she got to sing 'Back to December,' or Mercedes' expression when Rachel wrote a song just for her. Her style evolved from kiddy play clothes to a Ralph Lauren-inspired look, and some of Kurt and Blaine's Dalton friends even asked her out. It felt really, really good to be wanted. And not because her crush screwed up with two slutty cheerleaders, or because the amazing, talented guy from her competition wanted to suck up to her almost-mom mother.

Graduation eventually rolled along, and she said goodbye to the best and worst memories she had. She thanked all her loyal, amazing, inspiring glee friends- "You certainly all deserve to have the best future imaginable for creating such a welcoming paradise of senior year for me"-and took Quinn aside. No one expected her to do so-they still winced at glanced at her when Quinn and Finn walked into the room hand in hand-, and she knew they were eavesdropping, but she needed to say something.

"I need to thank you, Quinn. You made me what I am today; you were the first one to be bitingly honest to me. It hurt, but it made me realize that I didn't like the way I acted... So obnoxious, and overpowering. I really hope you have a fulfilling, happy life with Finn. Invite me to your wedding. I want to know that the person who made me happy can be happy too. Goodbye, for now." It ended with her giving a shellshocked, silent Quinn a hug, and strutting out of her high school for the last time. She had only one summer left before Oxford, now. Yes, yes, she was going to New York for theatre, but the English culture was spectacular, and even dramatic plays were good practice. Plus, what harm could it do to really clear her mind, and get a fabulous education? And, british accents-kind of hot.

On September 1st, the first day of the Oxford semester, it was clear to Rachel that the upperclassmen who helped out with the dorms had one goal, and one goal only-to torment freshmen. It was her tenth time asking someone for directions, and nothing was helping.

"I highly doubt that you don't know where that dormitory is, as you are supposed to have been here for three years. Are you incompetent? I have simply asked for you to direct me to the dorm specified on this sheet, and all you've done is-excuse me, my eyes are up here, you animal- all you've done is blabber about the best steakhouses. And I'm a vegan." A wisp of her ebony hair fluttered out of her bun and she blew it away in frustration. "I will find my dorm myself, if you're just going to waste my time." With a decisive humph, she clutched her rolling suitcase, and flew through the door. Or more at the door. Mortified, she checked again that she had walked into a huge, wooden, looming door. But at second glance, it was a boy. A smiling, cute, British boy.

"Are you a freshmen too?," he asked, eyes darting about hopefully. She stuffed her hands in the pockets of her jeans.

"Unfortunately. It seems that some of these seniors have thrown out their manners to make room for schoolwork." He laughed. Mystery boy laughed! Mystery boy must have a name, right? She must find out his name. "What's your name?" She cringed; it sounded like she was a lonely preschooler clinging to a seventh grader.

"James Giralda. Hopeful star of the stage, hopeful A-plus student, and hopeful date of yours." Rachel covered her mouth to hide a giggle, but her eyes danced with laughter. "I'm sorry, that was incredibly cheesy. And stupid. I just wanted to know, um... What's your name? I told you mine, it's customary for you to tell me yours. Please." Rachel's heart burst with fireworks.

"Rachel Berry. I'm actually here for musical theatre; I've been singing all my life. The whole, um, England-thing is temporary; after I get a good education, I'm going to Broadway. I'm sorry, this is off topic, but, what dorm are you in? It would be good to have someone to follow home when I get lost." James laughed again. Laughing two times-that was a good sign! Right? Right?

"I think we might be in the same dorm, actually. Shall we walk?" He offered his arm and she placed her hand on his elbow dramatically. Skipping down the pavement, James interrogated her. "Why go to England at all? Julliard not good enough for you?"

"No, it's not that. I-I spent my whole life being just an inch away from the top, and then I'd screw up and fall down again. I was afraid, to be honest. New York is a big city, with a lot of brilliant people. I wanted to know that I was the best, truthfully the best! Or, at least have a good enough college on my resume to get a better part-time job than waitressing. Vegan restaurants do not equal good tips. And being poor would have augmented my need to be better. Always better." Her mouth kept moving, words flowing. She told James things she didn't even know, and they were confusing to her, and outlandish. "Look, I'm sorry for this. Being a bit of a mess, and all. Really, if I'm too weird, you never have to see me again. I'm not placid, or tranquil. I'm not the type of person someone like you should be with. You'll notice that I am very overdramatic about insipid, irrelevant events, and-. Wow, again with the rambling. I'm just going to go, you know?" Hurriedly, she took her suitcase out of James clasped hand, and tightened her knee-length, tan trench coat. "I hope that we will get to be good comrades in our studies, and never gain bad blood for each other. Goodbye, James. And thank-you. I needed an outlet, and I got it."

"I'll be your outlet next weekend, too," James added hopefully. Rachel's self-control struggled. _Heartbreak, Rachel, heartbreak. Guys like him don't go for girls like-_

_ "_Here's my number!"

Might be a little abrupt, but oh well. And yes, Finn comes into the picture soon… very soon. R&R! Thank-you!


	2. Chapter 2

"Finn, for the last time, you do not put whites in with colors!" Finn Hudson rolled over in bed to see his fiancee, Quinn glaring at him with a splotchy pink polo shirt. "What are you going to wear to the country club tonight? No one wants to see you dressed like an animal! It's humiliating. If only getting into the Lima Community College wasn't enough, you now insured your reputation as an idiot!" Quinn glued her hand to her hip and pivoted to walk out.

"Quinn, hold on! You can't blame stuff like this on me! You dropped out of school to be a housewife, this is like… housewife stuff! And two sets of laundry? How am I supposed to know which is which? I don't have time to look! Rach-" He stopped himself. As much as he hated to admit it, Rachel still crossed his mind every time something went wrong. Quinn was always talking about how Finn had to stick to her, and first-love crap like that, but the thing was, if he was being honest, Rachel was his first _love, love. _Quinn was just kind of there, and he was quarter-back so why wouldn't he date head cheerleader? And when she got pregnant, everyone was telling him the you have to love a baby and be a family and stuff, so it just fit together to say they were in love. Quinn might have been. Finn wasn't.

"How you manage to bring the dwarf into everything is mind-boggling Finn. Mind-boggling! What is it with her? I'm prettier, and we were meant to be! You chose me Finn, now act like it!" Quinn's voice broke in hurt. God, Finn hated it when girls did that. Sure, it was good to know you won the fight, but really, all you did was make someone hurt. He tried to back-pedal.

"All I was trying to say is that… Rachel Ray-that's the hot, designer cook, right?-Rachel Ray is like, a great example, and I should watch her more, so I can make your life easier. I-I wasn't even thinking about that Rachel. She's yeah, ugly, and spazzy. You're great, Quinn…" He rubbed the back of his neck and lumbered over to her. Like a regretful child, he tried to wrap his arms around her. She slapped him.

"No! I am tired of being the second-choice, when I was everyone else's first. You may think that you made a hard decision, but what about me? I was freaking prom queen! I won cheerleading nationals, and glee nationals! I was so loved by everyone, that your own best friend wanted to sleep with me. I made the choice here, Finn! I made the choice to go with the nice guy who had a soft spot for losers. Not you. So stop acting like you didn't want me to make it! Start making me think you were worth giving up my future for."

"Cause that's the way to a guys heart! Hey, I'm so wanted by everyone that I had to cheat on every single one of my boyfriends! Including you! I thought you wanted something, you know, and I thought when we started going out again that you meant it this time. Why are you allowed to cheat, and I'm not allowed to even think about one of my best friends?"

"Who was also a girlfriend! God, if you are so perfect and God-damned holy, go do something with yourself!" Quinn thrust the closet doors open, and Finn's heart started playing hopscotch.

"Wh…What are you doin' Quinny?" His voice was weak, and shallow.

"Leave Finn. And come back like the guy I wanted to be with in high school, not the martyr who settled for the most popular girl in school. You know, I don't know you anymore Finn. And I wonder if you know yourself. So go meet the Finn Hudson who loves Quinn Fabray. High school may finally be over, but that doesn't mean that we have to end. Golden boy and golden girl can still have their Disney ending! Just go and get it. That's all I want!" Tears streamed down her face, but Finn stood in the middle of the room, a dazzled expression on his face. Yeah, like when Mr. Schue told him to sing that 'Hello' song. He just needed to meet the Finn Hudson that bounced back from bitchy Quinn, and bounced into nice-Quinn's arms.

Something about London had always made Finn feel dumb. Like there was something he was missing out on. Being there didn't really make it much better. He was there for a few reasons. Rachel, well, he wasn't sure where she was going to school, but he didn't want to see her in New York. And he needed to go somewhere that still spoke English. Not even Schue's coolness in glee could make him listen in Spanish. And when Rachel tutored him they um, didn't get much tutoring really done. So yeah, he took some money from his parents and went to England. Burt told him he could repay it when he worked for the tire shop, but he wasn't sure. He didn't really think he could be a good engineer. Yeah, but London. Everyone was so smart there, and said words like 'capitol' and drank tea at five. He didn't even like tea! So walking past Big Ben, he decided he needed to get somewhere else. Not like, else, else, because he really did like England. But somewhere that was close to the city, but was really a small-town. Just like he was used too. He didn't know much about England, though. The only town he really knew of was Oxford. And that was like, the HQ for smart people. But something told him it had it's upsides. And he bought the first train ticket to Oxford, rented a cheap apartment, and prepared to find the real Finn. Without girls and drama. Without people who knew him to be one way, or thought he was someone he wasn't. Just as him.

As soon as he had settled into his apartment, Finn had to get out. All the jet-lag was making him really tired, but an excited energy pulsed through him. He wanted to move, and make friends, but his body felt like rusty metal. And what was the oil for rusty metal? Coffee! Just the word put his senses on high, and he bounded down the stairs. (If he waited for the creaky, old elevator, he'd fall asleep.)

A fresh, biting cold greeted him as he stepped onto the street. His mind led him back through the town to a little old cafe called 'Cafe Coffee,' and he jumped up the stairs. He was about to walk in when he saw a familiar, miniature figure ordering a soy coffee (he didn't know those existed.) Oh no. Oh, God, no.

"Finn?" And there it was, the soprano voice that he knew so well. "How are you?," Rachel asked cheerfully. Wow, she looked good. Her skinny jeans ran slickly into her tall boots, and her Ralph Lauren, red, long-sleeved polo hung just loosely enough to see her tiny frame underneath it. A giant yellow polo player enveloped the left side of her chest, which he noticed when he… Well, yeah. He checked her out a little bit. And gaped at her a little bit. She leaned towards him for a one handed hug, which he was to shocked to return. He didn't think Rachel was over him to this far a point. She wasn't hiding tears, and she greeted him like a good friend. Not an ex who crushed her heart.

"I'm… good, I guess. You look really, really good and all. But, why aren't you… Why aren't you in New York?" She smiled.

"Oh, it's so crazy that we haven't talked in so long! I decided I needed a better education before I could launch a fulfilling career. My solos, though inspiring and emotional, could still use a bit of tuning up. But what about you? How's Quinn? And um, did you get into any schools?," she sounded hopeful, like she wanted him to succeed, and go to school.

"Just one. Community college. Quinn says it's crappy and messed up that I only got into one school, but it's good." He nodded and rocked back and forth on his toes. "Quinn sent me to England, actually. Wanted me to find myself, because you know. We've been having… trouble." Rachel's eyes looked incredibly sympathetic.

"Wow, Finn. Don't listen to anyone who wants you to feel bad about college. You know, really it's just what you make of it. But, don't loose Quinn either. She is a good person. She deserves you." Finn melted into her eyes for a while as she nodded up at him, but she broke the moment. "I had better get going. School's tough, and I have a lot to do." She squeezed his shoulder. "I'll see you around, Finn." Something leapt inside him as she went to walk away.

"Wait! What if we don't see each other?I mean, Rach, we…" She looked at him bewilderedly. "I mean, Rachelleeeee, Rach-elle." He glanced at her, cautiously. "Let's just make sure we get in touch. Do you want to maybe go out-"

"Finn," Rachel started softly. "I know you're hurting right now from Quinn. But we learned in high school that we didn't work. I mean, have you ever noticed that the only time we love each other is when someone else breaks our hearts? I got over the need to be with you a long time ago. I just want you to be able to be happy too. And, besides-"

"Hey, Ray! There you are!" A sandy haired, blue eyed kid came over and Rachel reached up to give him a kiss on the cheek.

"James! This is Finn, an old friend of mine. I've told you about him. Remember?" She looked at him meaningfully. His eyes flashed with recognition, and he wrapped his arm around Rachel.

"Yeah, I remember. How are you, mate?" He put his hand out, and Finn hesitated. _Go for it, Finn. Rachel's right, friends is all you should be. Make nice with this guy. _

"Good," Finn responded, clasping James' hand. Rachel beamed with delight.

"James and I were just getting coffee, and now we're gonna go study. He just needed a book, from across the street." She gestured to the store across the street. "We're both going to be in the freshman drama play together. James is really into acting, and I am teaching him to sing."

"Are you? Well, I apologize in advance; even though you are a greta teacher, my voice is monstrous." The James kid laughed. Jealousy flared up in Finn again.

"Yeah, well, she is a great teacher. Don't underestimate her, either. We kissed when ever she taught me." Rachel's eyes widened as silence prolonged. James looked appalled, and angry.

"James, can I meet you in the library? Sorry, I just need to talk to Finn." They kissed as he departed, and his hand lingered in her grip as he left. "What are you doing, Finn? I am finally happy. With someone who doesn't care that I may be a little melodramatic, or that I like some recognition for what I do. I've moved on, and you should've too. All your doing to Quinn is what you did to me. Stringing her along, and hoping she's still there to catch you when you fall. Here's a hint. You're to big for me to catch now. Let go. And don't bother calling me, Finn. Please just let me be happy. If you ever really loved me, you'll give me that much." She took long strides down the steps, and Finn's shoulders slumped. He never thought he would know what it was like for Rachel. When she was with Jesse, yeah, he was jealous, but he also knew that she wanted him too. And now he understood the real pain of wanting someone who had moved on. Because Rachel had never seemed more pleasant or caring than she did right now.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I don't actually know a lot about Oxford, so if some of the references aren't true, just think of them as things they altered in the future. Really, I just wanted to do something in England, because the UK is the best. Enjoy!**

Finn had never seemed more undesirable. He wasn't even out of his relationship, and he was making drunken comments about private moments in a high school fling that _he _ended? It made Rachel's blood boil. furiously, she flung open the doors to the library. James is sitting at attention in their favorite spot-the little window seat in the back of the room. It was near the kids books, so no one ever really went there, and it was so peaceful to look outside, and smile at the fresh air, and chirping birds. She started before he could even open his mouth.

"I am so sorry. You know that nothing has happened between me and Finn for years, and I find it completely unacceptable to make comments like that. Unresolved feelings for me aside, he should be able to be an adult, and let my personal relationships be. I must apologize profusely on his part, and it won't happen again. I informed him, maybe a bit harshly, that our affairs are completely separate now that high school is over, and the best way to look at me is as a loyal friend, and teammate. Not as a potential, or former love interest." James' arm snaked around her waist.

"It's okay. I'd be jealous too. Sit down, Ray. He isn't even relevant right now. He hurt you, and you had every right to be harsh, but now it doesn't matter." She smiled faintly and allowed herself to be pulled onto the long cushion. "Can you help me with my lines, please?" James handed her a thick script.

"Yeah. Thank-you for letting that go so easily; I feel awful about it. I've ruined relationships by looking back too much, or not being over someone, but not now. That's never been the case with you. We're real, you and I. Never forget that no matter what anyone else does, it won't affect the way I feel right now." She squeezed his hand and pulled away. "Where do you want to start? I noticed that you've been having some trouble with Act 2. Shall we try it from the top?"

Class was really boring in college. Most kids blew it off, and the ones that did come were simple annoyances. Usually, Rachel spent the time scribbling down lyrics in the margins of her notes, but today, there were other things at hand. James might be over the Finn incident, but she wasn't. That just wasn't what was supposed to happen.

She'd known for a long time that Finn's feeling were never real for her. They were just a way of being held at night, and not having to tell people you were alone. But the way his eyes flashed when James had wandered over… That wasn't something you could just conjure up. Unless Finn's acting skills had greatly improved since Rocky Horror. She knew they hadn't. He didn't act, just sang awkward love duets with Rachel in glee, played football for Quinn, ran errands for Quinn, defended his duets with Rachel to Quinn, broke up with Quinn, made-out with Quinn, and won titles at school dances with Quinn. It was all she could do to hope he hadn't been hurt by her too badly, just badly enough to back off. His half-smile wasn't intoxicating anymore, it was stupid. His clumsy compliments weren't cute, they were aggravating. Finn was aggravating. Because he thought he could just waltz in and reignite feelings that may very well ruin Rachel's relationship! She was running in circles with this. The main idea of her train of thoughts was that Finn, and everything related to Finn, was out of her life, and she didn't want him to come back in. But it looked like he actually wanted too. And that scared Rachel.

She ran her mind over fool-proof plans to ensure Finn's backing off, playing with tiny details from his life. What was something so important to him it was terrifying? More importantly, what was something that would rage at the idea of Finn and Rachel? Quinn.

A bell pealed through the sound of the professor's voice lecturing, and kids jumped up. Usually, Rachel stayed and made sure she had everything placed neatly in her bad, but she couldn't help herself. She needed to solve this problem the only way she knew how. Desperately, she threw the drawers in her single dorm room open and rummaged for a small packet of phone numbers that Mr. Schue had given each of the glee kids. They were the numbers of every glee student, and all teachers affiliated with glee in any way. Ms. Pillsbury, Mr. Schue, Mrs. Holliday-Schuester. But that wasn't important. What was important was the neat, size-12 print that read 'Fabray, Quinn.' Two columns stacked underneath the headings 'Home' and 'Mobile.' Quinn's mobile was the only one listed. In Rachel's haste to dial the phone, she misdialed a few times. But when she finally got it right, she threw back on her starred bedspread.

"Hello?" There it was. That fragile little voice that haunted Rachel, and forced her to be the best.

"Yes, Quinn. It's Rachel Berry. There's something you should know." Rachel could practically hear Quinn's eyes rolling in her head.

"Look, all that stuff you told me at graduation… It was incredibly awkward, and I'd really just forget about it. We are not buddy-buddy, and I really don't appreciate that you feel the need to stalk me. I am waiting for my fiancee to return from a lengthy, therapeutical trip to England-"

"Fiancee? Finn didn't tell me that when he came to see me, and then mouthed off to my boyfriend about us making out." The line went silent. "Quinn, are you still there? Because I'd really like to keep my life going at the happy pace it is now, and Finn dropping in on me, and asking me out wasn't the plan."

"You're lying to me. You just couldn't resist the chance to ruin my life, so when Kurt, or Mercedes, or someone told you Finn was away, you umped at the chance-"

"Please, Quinn. I can put my boyfriend on to validate this. I can even go get Finn from down the street. All I'm proposing is that you help me help you. I don't want him around, and if he knew you were informed of his traitorous doings, he would go crying back to you."

"Damn, Berry, for a dwarf you have a big brain. I'll call him. Let him know that I found out. Maybe I'll even slip in your name to infuriate him against you. I never thought I'd say this, but Berry, I'm glad you called.

**Sorry it was so short, but something important DID happen! **


	4. Chapter 4

Finn was pissed. Like, really p.o'd. Was this the worlds idea of screwing with him? He barged into the cafe, rage blinding him. Like a hungry bear, he swung his head around, searching for his petite prey. Zeroing in on her, he charged.

"What the fuck, Rachel?"

"Finn, I have no idea what you are talking about." Color seeped into Rachel's checks as customers and baristas turned to stare at her.

"I'm talking about you making me look like an asshole in front of my girlfriend."

"Your being irrational. At least lower your voice; we're in public. We can talk through this in a more conducive location, and hopefully come to a reasonable explanation for your ridiculous outburst. And please, stop with the profanities."

"Cut the crap. Why would you call Quinn? Seriously, we talked for two seconds! What's your problem? So I wanted to hang out! That's not some kind of undercover… booty call!"

"Finn, I just felt that your conduct the other day was inappropriate and that your _fiancee _deserved to know. That's all; really. I understand that you both may be smarting from a petty quarrel, but I'd really just like to see you two settled down in an honest relationship, so two people very close to my heart can be happy-"

"BS! You keep saying that, like you know everyone in the world! Maybe Quinn isn't what makes me happy! All those things I thought I needed her for… Colleges didn't give a crap! Prom king of Lima meant shit to the rest of the world, and… What they cared about was you; they just kept asking 'What's Rachel doing?' in these obnoxious voices, and I'm just not wanted, Rach! You are. And that's what really showed me what matters, and why I screwed up lying to you. You just wanted the truth! Quinn wanted a front row seat to a football game, and a pretty crown. And all that first love stuff… Yeah, it sounds adorable and perfect, but Quinn wasn't a _love… _More a… a… infactation." Rachel giggled softly. "What?"

"Infatuation was the word you were looking for." She timidly brushed a loose piece of hair behind her ear.

"What's the matter? You look scared."

"For a minute there, you just sounded like the old Finn, you know? The one I fell in love with in tenth grade." Her eyes ventured up into his, and for a moment there was silence. "Look, Finn, I know I've seemed a little dismissive, or harsh the past few days, but I really, finally thought I'd escaped the ghosts of my past! But maybe you're just a Casper."

"Is that a gay ghost? 'Cause, I know, I don't have a problem with gays, but I don't play for that team…"

"No, no Finn! It's the friendly ghost, the one that helps Wendy! In all those old Halloween cartoons, remember? It was stupid, anyways. Just mixed up nostalgia coming through." The Rachel Berry beam really broke through her face: not just a smile, but a 1-million wattage chain of Christmas lights. That's what they reminded Finn of, anyways.

"Yeah. My mom would always put that on when I was screaming and she had to work. Something about other kid's happiness being… therapeutic. I thought it was kinda dumb, but it stopped me crying. Like your water thing. Just was a stupid substitute."

"Well, substitute or not, I'm glad you didn't spend your childhood unhappy. You know, your mom is great. Water helped, but if she really played that cartoon for you to see others' happiness, that was a stroke of genius. I think that was what I missed all along! My dads were sure to support me in personal endeavors, but never instilled in me an appreciation for other's work!" Rachel's face scrunched into her excited, discovery look. "Bye, Finn. I'm glad we got to talk! We should do it again, sometime. I'd love to see you, so feel free to call. And don't take that invitation lightly. I was considering blocking you from my phone for harassment." Finn looked wary for a moment, confused for a millisecond, and content for a flash. It was really Rachel. Gently, she leaned close to his face, and kissed him lightly on the cheek. "It's just crazy this all happened so fast! Don't forget to call, Finn."

He stood there for a moment, processing the events. Wasn't she just murdering him for implying anything date-like? Was this a trick investigation thing for real harassment charges? Was that even legal? The spot on his cheek seared through his skin. A kiss! On the cheek, but still. Wait, did that mean he wanted to kiss Rachel? Yeah, now she was really awesome, and desirable or whatever, but he was gonna marry Quinn. No, wait, he just said he didn't like Quinn. That's what he thought he meant, at least. Maybe it was reverse psychology, or something. He could almost hear Rachel telling him that was a misused term.

"Can I help you?," a chipper barista smiled. She wore a little, oval shaped hat, like a military officer. Her apron hung snugly over the front of her body.

"No, I mean, not coffee wise. That's supposed to like, stimulate your brain and make you think a lot, right? I can't think anymore. Because I'm really screwed right now. I'm engaged, but we're kind of on a break, kind of not, and I also might be in love with my high school girlfriend, who's here, and I just can't handle this! I'm not cut out for complicated relationships!" Finn felt sweat trickling down his forehead, and seized fistfuls of his hair. The gentle touch of a hand on his forearm cooled him off.

"I think you might need a distraction. That girl said your name was Finn, right? Well, I'm Kelly. And if I can't get you coffee, maybe I can get something else for you. I'd love to come over, and see your place. I'm a part time massage therapist, so I also know a lot about balance. Clutter stresses you out, you know. Especially too many clothes. We can get rid of some of those." Finn jerked his head up; he knew where this was going. Something inside him screamed to run away, but he didn't protest as Kelly slipped a tiny card in his pocket. "Call me. We can hang out."

"Yeah." Finn's brain nearly ceased from exhaustion as he weighed the pros and cons of the girl in front of him. "Hey, actually, do you wanna just come over now? I can wait 'til your shift is over." His body tingled with remorse as she untied her apron, revealing a skin tight t-shirt.

"It's over now. Let's go."

It sucks to wake up to a slut. Really, it does. She tries to be all sexy, but it's like 10 AM, and really, you just want food.

"Can you just, like, leave? I screwed up by doing this. Sorry." Finn shrugged indifferently at Kelly.

"You serious? I don't get _anything?"_

_ "_Well, you're not a prostate, so no. Take a soda out of the fridge if you want." As she barged out of his tiny apartment, his phone buzzed. Rachel flashed across the screen. Did he really still have her programmed in.

_Early morning today. In the mood for breakfast? _Finn scanned the text, words jumbling together. Rachel! This was the second time he'd slept with someone else while he wanted her and she was dating someone else. But he had to come clean about it. He wasn't gonna fuck up again.

_Meet u at the cafe in trn. _His fingers wiggled over the keyboard, missing letters. Immediately after getting a smiley face in reply, he dashed on some clothes. His system was broken. What else did he do when he got up? Food. He was going to see Rachel for that, though. Stupidly, he ran a toothbrush through his mouth and pulled his fingers through his hair. Done.

The morning air was brisk, and a light stream of water drizzled out of his building's gutter. Water! Did he need to shower? Nah. It was alright. The cafe loomed before him and he took the steps in twos, strangely excited for his confession to Rachel. And there she was, smiling at the corner table, gazing at the morning paper. At his entrance, she perked up.

"Finn! I'm so excited for this, really. The chance to rekindle our friendship is superb on so many levels. We can write together, and I can help you write some more colege applications out… Not that you need to go to a different college, I just know that you have such great potential! And-what's wrong?" Tears welled in Finn's eyes as he spilled out about Kelly. Rachel's mouth stayed glued shut throughout the narrative, and Finn's heart pumped with fear.

"Is your silence a new mad signal? Because I already know I screwed up, so…"

"No, Finn, I'm just torn. Part of me knows that I have my own boyfriend, and who you have sexual intercourse with has nothing to do with me anymore, but another part of me is disappointed. You seemed so mature, and real yesterday. You were truly honest with me. And sleeping with that girl-Kelly, was her name?-wasn't honest to her, Quinn, or you. I just wish you would have learned something from high school. Cheating isn't acceptable, I've learned that from you, and don't tell me you and Quinn are on a break. I spoke with her, and she is very much under the impression that this is a necessary retreat for you, and there is no question that you two will be married upon your return to Lima. But I'm glad you were honest with me Finn." Her hand covered his. "It's a good start. But I think the hard part is going to be working out your feelings for Quinn, and telling her the whole truth. It will be scary, but somethings you just have to do. We both know it will end badly if you hide this excursion."

"Thanks, Rachel. That makes sense. It just sucks so much, though. She sent me here. She got me pissed. I wish I could just turn back time to tenth grade! Where the fuck did tenth grade go?"

"FInn, if it helps, I'm not feeling great either. I haven't been completely honest… to James. He tries to deny it, but I know he doesn't like you. I h haven't told him where I am right now. Can we make a pact? We tell our significant others the full extent of our doings and feelings by the end of the day. No matter how jumbled we are, we need to face this." Finn nodded.

"Okay. Yeah. Can you… help me?"

"I might need help for myself."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sorry I haven't updated in a few days! Hope you enjoy this chapter! It's not my best, but I think it'll be good! Review! I don't own Glee.**

Phones were rather pointless. Well, when you were Rachel Berry. Because, chances were, you were absolutely terrified of taking anyone's call. As illustrated by the blinking '25 New Texts' on her iPhone screen.

All she'd wanted to do when she saw Finn was regain an old friendship, and get her life to be perfect-finally. She had James, and a best friend, and she was utterly successful in all of her school classes and extracurriculars. But now it was like high school on crack. Finn had texted her nonstop for the past few days, and she couldn't help the little bubbly feeling her stomach got when she saw the message on her phone. But that was what scared her. James gave her that bubbly feeling, too! And what sucked is she had no one to rant to because her two best friends happened to be the problem. Sighing, she perched herself daintily on the bed. _Check the message Rachel. Really. Just read it. _The screen lit up as she flitted through her messages. James. Yes, that's who she wanted to read a text from. Her boyfriend. The boyfriend that laughed at all of her jokes, paid for dinner every night, let her criticize his singing, and was as immersed in theater as she was.

_Where the fuck are you? I've been txting for hours :/. _Shit. Ok. That was not expected. Composing herself, she typed, _My phone died. I lost the charger. Srry babe! Meet for lunch later? _Satisfied with the simple excuse, she tapped the send button. The reply was immediate.

_Perfect. I have a cool snging thing you should do. It's open song night at the bar tomorrow. Sing? Give you details at lunch. _Her heart settled down. SInging was all that was necessary for her to really calm down. Lazily, she clicked Finn's text.

_We shod talk. Like, do u like me again, or is that a dum qu? _Puzzled, Rachel cocked her head. Did she like Finn? Yes. Well, no. Not like that. Certainly not like he seemed to like her. Right? Hmm, singing could sort this out too. All she needed was a song about moving on, and forgiveness. But no one really forgives their first boyfriend, do they? They scream curses, spread rumors, and send texts with a cheap new phone so they don't recognize the number-oh. Only Rachel did that last one. Pulling on a gray blazer, she danced out the door. James would have to tell her about the singing thing first.

When she got to the dining hall, he was gazing pensively out the window at their favorite table. Skipping the food, she trotted behind him and enveloped his eyes with her hands.

"Ray! Your here."

"Hi, James. I have something to tell you. Finn and I have reconciled, and we will have a strictly platonic relationship for his remaining time in England. In fact, I was even considering inviting him for that open-mike you were telling me about." An awkward silence prolonged. Rachel's hands dripped with sweat and she rubbed them together hopefully.

"I know." Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Wow. That was _not _supposed to happen! Really not. "I'm not mad Rachel. I'm glad you feel like you can have friends outside of this relationship. But… You really didn't think you could tell me? We've been going out three months now; aye that's not that long, but we could a least trust each other. That's all I want." His hand grasped hers lovingly and she studied the cracks in the table. A faint 'True Love Never Dies' was etched into the wooden table. Rachel knew that was true. The problem was, she didn't know who she was truly in love with.

Rachel wasn't really expecting Finn to come; she'd texted him like, two hours ago. But she couldn't say she wasn't thrilled when she saw him lumbering over to the one open table in the back. A smoky smell drifted through the bar, and a so-so, middle-aged drunk crooned sadly on the stage. The situation was amateur, and stupid, but Rachel couldn't help but feel nervous. The place was obviously somewhere people actually _went; _it was packed! Every table was inhabited by some variation of college student or mid-life crisis-victim. Her stomach flipped when she saw some of the girls from her Drama class flipping their hair languidly at some seniors. How were they uninterested? Never mind. The lady finished her tune with a powerful yell, and claps spotted through the audience. Rachel stepped up as the room went silent. Finn and James' faces simultaneously lit up. Everyone stared at her, and she tugged at her jeans.

"This is a song by one of my favorite bands, MoZella, named 'Light Years Away.' It's about forgiving a guy that really hurt you, which, might be impossible for Taylor Swift," some people giggled. "But is not impossible for me." She looked straight at Finn as a guitar strummed away.

_"It's almost like you had it planned _

_It's like you smiled and shook my hand and said _

_'Hey, I'm about to screw you over, big time'_

_And what was I supposed to do? _

_I was stuck in between you and a hard place _

_We won't talk about the hard place _

_But I don't blame you anymore _

_That's too much pain to store _

_It left me half dead _

_Inside my head _

_And boy, looking back I see _

_I'm not the girl I used to be _

_When I lost my mind _

_It saved my life _

_It's how you wanted it to be _

_It's like you played a joke on me _

_And I lost a friend _

_In the end _

_And I think that I cried for days _

_But now that seems light years away _

_And I'm never going back _

_To who I was _

_Cause I don't blame you anymore _

_That's too much pain to store _

_It left me half dead _

_Inside my head _

_And boy, looking back I see _

_I'm not the girl I used to be _

_When I lost my mind _

_It saved my life _

_I think that I cried for days _

_But now that seems light years away _

_And I'm never going back _

_To who I was _

_Cause I don't blame you anymore _

_That's too much pain to store _

_It left me half dead _

_Inside my head _

_And boy, looking back I see _

_I'm not the girl I used to be _

_When I lost my mind _

_It saved my life _

_That life seems like light years away _

_Light years away _

_And that life seems like light years away _

_Light years away," _she sang softly as the audience's applause grew louder. Finn, however, looked a little disappointed. Rachel beamed at her overall success and leaned forward.

"Thank-you!" She flew down the stage steps, and went to James table.

"That was beautiful," he whispered into her ear. And for one second, everything seemed perfect.

**A/N: Thanks guys! I thought that wasn't great, but it's important! ANyways, I love MoZella, and all song credit goes to her. Here's a link to 'Light Years Away,' aka the best song ever: .com/watch?v=zOJCK4UFTNM Review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Okay, so just found out that Glee is doing a silent episode, which I am more than mad about, but I thought I'd try and take a page out of their book. This chapter has no dialogue (except for flashbacks), but there will still be a lot of Finn-y moments included. Not to toot my own horn (toot! toot!), but I think a silent chapter would be better than a silent episode. I mean, in writing you get to hear the character's inner thoughts. In TV shows and movies… not so much. Anyways, hope you enjoy, and let me know what you think in reviews! Unfortunately, I have not magically transformed into Ryan Murphy in the past few days, and consequently still do not own Glee. **

Finn was feeling a lot more depressed than he should be. Rachel had moved on. It was a solid fact from the minute he'd seen her in London. But what about… moving backwards? Because, like, he thought he'd moved on from Rachel, but apparently not… did he ever really not like that smiley, Striesand-wannabe, kind, sort of stalker? No. He'd always loved Rachel. He would always love Rachel.

After she sang that song, and everyone clapped so hard, he could tell she was impressed with herself, which was rare. Rachel Berry had pretty high standards, and if she met them, she spent no time pretending it was a surprise. Which was incredibly obnoxious, but also incredibly lovable. He knew she'd reached every note in that song before. It wasn't ground-breaking. But maybe she was impressed because other people were impressed.

He'd never took the time to ponder Rachel's life. He just looked at it and either said 'it sucks,' or 'it rocks.' But, how many friends did she really have in high school? Sure, Kurt and Mercedes started to include her in their sleepovers, and Blaine would hang out with her occasionally, but how did it really feel to be completely ignored for what you know is good work? With Finn, he always got that recognition on the football field, or even from other glee members. No one cared about Rachel. And how must it feel to be dumped for the bigger and better, shinier new toy that everyone wanted-three times? Once by her mom? And twice by the same guy? God, that was disgusting. Did Finn really do that? Okay, ew. Screw-up moment. Not that rights and wrongs are the point. If Rachel got a good grade, people yelled at her for being a nerd. If Rachel got a bad grade, people told her she was stupid. If Rachel embraced her culture, she was told to move to Israel. If she tried new things, no one included her. Sure, joining the African-American Pride Club was weird, but if it was what she wanted to do… And besides, she was a first. But if Finn, got a good grade, everyone high-fived him, and Quinn would give him a kiss, and whisper in his ear, "One day, we'll have a real baby with the money from the job that grade will get you." He felt accomplished. Rachel felt like crap.

Another thing that bothered him was her dads. Not the being gay thing. That was fine; but what did she miss out on without a mom? Finn remembered how he would feel during his Mommy & Me classes at the library, and cherished the sensation. He wished he could whisper the memory to Rachel, and she would receive the warm blanket of love that covered you when you leaned against your mom, listening sleepily to a picture book. It probably hurt more that she was five coffee dates away from being like that with Shelby. Even if it wasn't the same age, you could always feel loved. Plus, even if Finn wasn't prejudiced, a lot of people were. He knew that not everyone (ahem, ahem, Karofsky) was okay with being homosexual, and that some had the nerve to say it was an abomination. He watched Kurt struggle through sorting out his feelings, saw Blaine awkwardly interacting with his father, but never considered that the child of a gay couple was just as weird to others. Rachel was just the weird _thing _that two faggots wanted for their birthday. Ugh. Disgusting. It brought back a time long ago, when he and Rach were just in elementary school. They weren't even friends then.

_Rain streaked down the school window as families gathered around the school tables, and flung off soggy raincoats. It was Heritage Day, and every kid had to bring in their parents to talk about their lives, and their family's history. Finn had felt stupid bringing his lone mom, and had tried to get Darren to come, but he was busy. Something about… Princeton, was it? Jennifer Atkins' mom was standing up there, lecturing about Irish history. Her father had just finished his own monologue on the Hispanic culture. As Mrs. Atkins closed her speech, Finn noticed Rachel squeezing one of her dads' hands, and leaning up to mutter something in their ear. Her red and white sailor's shirt with the red, pleated skirt was inching down her waist, but the other father pinned it with a safety pin. Mrs. Hansel clapped her hands and stood before the class. The Berrys grinned._

_ "The Berry's are next! These special parents chose to do a joint project on," she adjusted her glasses, and consulted the clipboard in her hand. "Ah. Gay marriage… Interesting choice. Well-" Just then, a holler broke through the room._

_ "I am _not _letting my angel Quinn listen to those two… those two… abnormalities on why it's okay to be gay! It's not a natural lifestyle! God didn't want this!" Mr. Fabray stood tall at the back of the room, and pointed angrily to the Berry's. Finns moms face went white, but not as white as Mr. and Mr. Berrys. It was sickening, really, to see the embarrassment and-was that shame?-on the entire family's faces. _

_ "Well, Mr. Fabray, I was just reaching that point. As that topic can be taken… ah, what's the word? Offensively, by some, I was just going to ask Mr and… Mr. Berry if they could possibly discuss something more neutral about their history such as… Judaism. Yes, that would be more appropriate for this environment. I think we can all agree on that." Mr. Fabray still stood, his face hard and cold as a ton of bricks, but the room chose to ignore it. He lowered himself steadily and nodded firmly._

_ "That would be an alright culture to hear about." Finn swore he heard Quinn mumble something about Jews being greedy pigs, but her father kneeled down and told her, "Jesus was a Jew, sweetheart. Concentrate on that, and hope that maybe one day these two… troubled men can learn something from him and be healed."_

Finn wasn't sure if the Berrys had chosen to do any lecture at all. He didn't think so. They were to prideful in their culture to compromise it. He hadn't been able to see Rachel's face during the encounter, but he remembered that she didn't go to school the next few days, and when she returned, it was with hurt and sorrow in her young eyes. She didn't deserve that. No one did. God, it sucked to be her.

Finn's heart ached a bit, and he shot up. He hadn't felt that pain for someone else since high school! Yeah, he'd felt bad when he saw Santana shunned for being gay, but he didn't feel real empathy. He didn't feel like he wanted to crawl up to her and wrap his arms around her, and make all the hurt go away. He didn't want to be the one to protect her. And now he wanted to be the one to protect Rachel. Damn James! Those two had looked pretty smitten last night. And now he needed her back. He remembered some stupid code name he'd come up with when Rachel was with Jesse. He had just watched the Bourne Identities and he really wanted to be that hot spy guy that everyone loved. So he created some stupid mission, but it never went into effect. Until now.

Operation Dream Girl was ago.

(Yeah, he named it after one of Rachel's favorite musicals. She was his dream girl, so it seemed fitting.)

**A/N: Okay, Sorry for the short chapter, but I have to catch up on a lot of my stories! I hope you like it. Let me know if you thought the silence thing was cool, because I was thinking about making the next one all silence as well, except from Rachel's point of view. Or I could revert back to dialogue-including chapters. It's your choice! But you gotta review to get what you want...**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Pantomime chapter edition 2! Same deal as last time, except from Rachel's POV. Enjoy! **

Rachel's life seemed like it was going well. Believe it or not, she was fairly popular at school, and everyone loved her solo last night. Alicia had invited her out afterwards to celebrate, and they'd gone and gotten drunk out of their minds… She'd forgotten how much a hangover sucked.

Tiredly, Rachel grasped to huge aspirins, and swallowed them dry, not thinking about the taste. They bounced down her parched, tight throat, and she coughed weakly. Something nagged at her… Something insignificant, but bothersome. Finn's face.

Rachel had lost a puppy before (he went to a "farm"), she'd been called a tranny before ("Hey, RuPaul," -Quinn), she'd lost her mother's love before, she'd been betrayed before, but this was different. She didn't want Finn to look so disappointed in her. It was him she'd spent her whole life impressing, she had to admit. It was him she spent most of her life loving. And those things stick around a while. They come back to get you. So, his face was a let down. She'd wanted him to be happy for her, and thrilled. Looking back, she knew that would never be the reaction she'd get. Not after that conversation they'd had.

It had been too hard to see Finn looking like that. She flicked through the memories when he had the same face on. None of them were good. All of them were supposed to be. Like, when she exposed Quinn's heinous plan to rope Finn into being a father. That was supposed to be that day when Finn fell head-over-heels for Rachel, and left Quinn forever! It just lost her the few friends she'd had.

_"Finn, would you tell me something that would hurt, but help me?" Rachel had had so many reserves about doing this. It wasn't right, was it? But it wasn't right that Finn was getting cheated out of having a real life, either._

_ "Um, well. You kind of scare me, and you talk way too much. You use confusing words. I don't know if that helps in real life, but-"_

_ "No, Finn, hypothetically."_

_ "You used big words again." Rachel sucked her teeth. He wasn't getting it. Out with it! No. Just one more try to confirm she was doing the right thing._

_ "I mean, if everyone else knew a secret that could potentially save my soul, but no one told me, would you tell me?"_

_ "I guess so, yeah." Yeah. That's right, she should tell him. Thinks of the benefits! A cool boyfriend, a fallen rival. Just like the movies. Just like how it was always supposed to be._

_ "Well, then believe me when I say that I tell you this for your own good." Rachel twisted her face. How should she put this? "Finn, are you a virgin?" His face turned beet red._

_ "Yes-I mean, no! Well, technically, yes. But Quinn said that the baby… It's something about a hot tub… Why does it matter?"_

_ "Finn, you can't have a baby if you haven't had sex." His face darkened; he understood now. He twitched violently. "I think we both know someone with an abnormal liking and concern for your girlfriend. And that someone is notorious for not being a virgin."_

_ "Who are you talking about! I'll _kill _them!"_

_ "Noah is the father. Noah Puckerman." There, it was out. Rachel released a breath of fresh air, but inhaled quickly as she heard the deafening slam of a fist meeting a locker. She flinched, and studied the floor. Her black flats with the white bows swirled in front of her._

_ "What the hell! Puck wouldn't do that, Rachel?" He sounded pleading, and she sighed._

_ "Wouldn't he, Finn? Be honest with yourself. This could be a good thing, though. You get your life back-"_

_ "How is this a good thing? My girlfriend… Put me through hell to hide that she fucked my best friend! This is humiliating! Even more than when she got pregnant… That bitch!" He stormed past Rachel._

_ "Finn!," she called after him. "I'm sorry!" He didn't look back, but growled deep in his throat._

_ "Don't be. You just ruined my life for the second time."_

Rachel wasn't a virgin, anymore. That honor had been given to Connor, from Dalton. But she still was responsible, all because of that day. It terrified her; the look in his eyes. What was she supposed to do? Get knocked up? But even if the day had scared her, she hadn't thought about Finn. He was very hurt, she knew that. But was it just that… Or was it everything?

When she cheated on him, she understood that it was embarrassing to have both of your girlfriends cheat with your best friend, really. But she chose to concentrate on the fact that Puck was responsible for both incidents. Now, she felt ready to see what it would really mean.

She closed her eyes, and conjured up Finn's face. She thought about it for a while, but chose James' face as her other example. She loved them both, even today. Then she made herself see Quinn. Bitchy, frosty Quinn in a tight Cheerio's uniform. Bitchy, frosty Quinn laying her hand delicately on James' shoulder, and sighing seductively. Bitchy, frosty Quinn curling up to Finn sexily.

Hot, boiling anger bubbled through Rachel. Jesus, if only that would melt Quinn's icy glare. It was insulting to think that everything good in her life went to her. She thought about how she felt when they sang Don't Stop with Quinn as the soloist. She pictured Quinn receiving the 'Most Likely To Be Famous' award on graduation day. It was petty, but that had still annoyed her.

Blood coursed through Rachels veins. She felt more alive than ever, in a bad way. She knew what she had to do to make this up. But she couldn't do it. There was too much at risk. _Whatever, _she told herself. _You've taken risks before. _

It was time to set the record straight with Finn.

**A/N: So, the chapter kind of sucked. (In my opinion, at least.) I kind of had writer's block, but had to be doing something. I felt like there wasn't much to say with Rachel, though, because she's always kind of felt everything that Finn felt. Review, though, and give me some better ideas!**


	8. Chapter 8

English weather was certainly very temperamental. Not even yesterday had the sky been a beaming blue, and now sheets of ice punched the rooftops with miniature fists. A few unlucky shoppers felt the wrath of the wind, and tried to protect themselves with a damp newspaper before dashing into Cafe Coffee. Finn lay back on his couch, and let the curtains drift closed. A sudden bell shook through the room. Hastily, Finn threw a robe over his bare chest, and straightened his McKinley High sweatpants. He yanked open the door, prepared to yell at some door to door salesman, but he got a very pleasant surprise instead-Rachel.

Her tiny frame shook from the cold, and her immaculately layered hair was slicked to her head. Her lips shone an eerie blue, but Finn had not even glanced at them when they met his.

Shocked, Finn wrapped his arms around her waist, catching her. His tongue attempted to push into her mouth, but she pulled back, and groaned. Pivoting, she shook her head.

"I'm sorry, Finn, I shouldn't have come. This is obviously not a good time for you, and I have a paper due tomorrow." For an actress, she was an awful liar.

"Wait, Rach! I'm not letting you go out there. It's like, negative one hundred degrees! You'll freeze to death!" He tugged her back into the room, and pushed her on the couch. Having closed the door, he pulled out two mugs, and poured some Dunkin' Donuts coffee mix into a brewer.

"Black, please," came Rachel's sigh. Finn reddened. Of course he knew it was black! She was vegan, and milk was obviously against that! She didn't eat much sugar, either. But Finn just nodded stupidly, and screwed on the top.

"Yeah, I drink it black, too." No, he didn't. He added four packets of sugar and half a gallon of milk first. Rachel giggled.

"Finn, we dated. I know you don't drink it black. Actually, I'm surprised you're not diabetic," she said smartly. Finn just handed her her coffee and smirked.

"I'm magic, remember? But… Why did you just kiss me, if we're not… dating?" Finn looked at Rachel with a gassy expression. "Not that you have to talk about it if you don't… want to."

"No, Finn, we should. Truthfully, you intrigue me. You've matured a lot, and I've developed feelings for you that have grown deeper than I would've believed possible three months ago." Finn grinned. Rachel smiled apologetically. "But… I-I do love James. And… I shouldn't have kissed you. That wasn't the plan when I came. It's cheating, and I don't want to ruin a good relationship." _Again, _they both added mentally. "I just came here to sort out my feelings for you. See if I'd really, honestly moved on." Finn heart pounded in his throat, strangling him. He pushed in on his stomach, trying to kill the nauseating butterflies.

"Have you?," he croaked. Rachel looked at him from under her thence, long eyelashes.

"I don't think so," she whispered. "I mean, that kiss… It just felt so good…" Finn scooted closer to her.

"We both know that I haven't moved on…" he told her. They gazed at each other, torn, and Finn was just about to lean in when a sharp rap on the door woke him up. He fell forward, bumping Rachel's nose ("Oh, no, Barbra… Please don't let it be broken! Please don't let it damage my vocal chords!"), pulling the light wire out of the wall, and kicking the coffee table into the next room. Surprisingly, the door flew open before Finn could answer it.

"Finn Hudson," said a stony-faced blond. "There is something called breaking-up, in which a person tells their significant other before making out with…" The figure jammed the wire back into the wall. "A goddamn dwarf!"

"Oh, I assure you, Quinn, Finn and I were just having a mature conversation-" Rachel tried to protest.

"Bullshit, Berry! I dated Finn, too, you know! In fact, according to Facebook, we're still engaged! He's too _stupid _to have a mature conversation! That's why he won't just tell me the truth!" She turned to Finn. "You know I have been considering putting you in a mental ward? You're trying to leave me for-that?" She threw her hand at Rachel, shocked.

"Quinn, Rach and I are just friends, really, I mean-"

"That's what about me and Puck when he got me _pregnant," _she screeched through gritted teeth. "Ugh! You are so retarded!"

"Quinn, such language is really not apropos to our situation!" Rachel stood up now, appalled. "I know from my time volunteering to sing for the mentally challenged that those people you call 'morons,' and 'retarded,' are much kinder than anyone at McKinley was! And, Coach Sylvester always seemed to like that Becky better than she ever did you, and guess what? She was retarded!" Quinn seethed. She turned to Rachel, and a growl rose in her throat.

"Berry!," she hollered. She grabbed Rachel's hair, who screamed a rare profanity, and shook her violently. Finn watched for a moment, but grasped Quinn around the waist, trying to pull her back. In protest, she bit his arm, and he quickly dropped her. Rachel resorted to almost Shakespearean words.

"You vile… maggot! Violence is never acceptable, never!" Quinn leapt at her again, and threw her at the wall.

"You stole my boyfriend… twice! You call me vile? Yeah, well, check your wardrobe out, RuPaul!" Rachel gasped, and ran towards Finn. Quinn chased her incessantly, and fought Finn for the lead. He pushed her back awkwardly, but she kicked and screamed with every fiber in her body. She broke past him, and rushed towards Rachel.

"Please, don't! Please, don't hurt me…" Rachel whimpered. Quinn scoffed and grabbed Rachel's head, who gasped one last protest. "I-I'm pregnant!"

**A/N: Very, very short. Very, very important! I didn't even expect the pregnancy to happen, but I kind of love it. Don't forget to review, and if you wouldn't mind, check out my profile! I have a lot of ideas that I need your take on, and a lot of stories that I'm sure you would enjoy! Thank you so much for the support! Highflyer101**


	9. Chapter 9

Rachel hadn't been positive before the confession escaped her lips. But looking at Quinn, and remembering the signs, she just knew. She'd been feeling sicker than she should be every day, she hadn't gotten her period that month, everything was blown up into huge proportions, and she had strangely non-vegan cravings-all the goddamn time. She inhaled shakily, and raised her eyes. Finn stood, shoulders hunched with a breathless expression, and Quinn was perched on the arm of the sofa, hands on hips. Her formerly vicious expression had transformed into a soft look of shock.

"How far along are you?" Quinn's eyes were closed as she struggled to process the information. Part of her wanted to scream _Slut!, Slut!, Slut!, _but a more pure part of her was whispering, _Less of a slut than you were. This is actually her boyfriend's kid… _Right? Searching for confirmation, Quinn frowned, "Is it-God what was your boyfriends name?-Is it his?"

"It's not Finns, if that's what your asking. I think I'm around a month." Rachel tentatively lifted her shirt, and examined the slightly swollen spot on her abdomen. "James doesn't know yet. You're the first to find out. And you must keep it a secret! I have to be the one to tell people. On my own terms. It's more responsible, and if I'm going to be a mother, that has to start now."

"Wait, you're-keeping it?," Finn asked in awe. "What about Broadway, Rach?"

"I am perfectly capable of finding someone to care for my child while I perform. Besides, I'm only in school now. I'll have a lot of time to become used to caring for a child, and juggling my different commitments." She gulped, and tears glazed over her eyes. Finn stepped closer to her.

"You don't have to, though. You could give it-"

"Finn! I thought that you, of anyone, would understand that I cannot give my baby away! Not after being denied by my own mother! I love my fathers, but I don't want this child to grow up as the reject kid of a hopeless dreamer and some gay guys needing a hobby!" Finn retreated back to the couch, surprised by her outburst. Rachel struggled to calm herself. "Abortion is also out of the picture, you know. Having a child is a blessing, not a curse. I don't want to kill anything. What if I never got onto Broadway, but this child was meant to?" Gently, Quinn joined in.

"Rachel, I know what it's like to have an inconvenient pregnancy. And I understand that you want to see your baby grow up feeling loved. But you were loved! And there are ways to get visiting rights-open adoptions-"

"Enough! I just want to be able to raise a baby to be a normal, yet incredibly talented protegee! Anything that was created in a loving relationship is worth it to me. Even if it wasn't the case for you, Quinn. Besides, you don't know the love that really goes into these things, so you still wouldn't understand. You got drunk, and made a mistake. I was in love with someone." Quinn looked appalled.

"I loved my baby more for that! It was a sign-from God-that the worst things can create beautiful results! And maybe I had a less solid financial background than you, and maybe it took more love for me to give up a baby because I knew it would have a better life!"

"Here's a hint to all mothers that use that excuse, Quinn: we don't have better lives! We live, wondering what we did wrong! Beth is probably starting to go through that as we speak!"

"I'm trying to help you, Rachel! Don't push me!" Quinn jutted her finger stubbornly at Rachel. Finn nervously cleared his throat as his two exes glared at each other. Days could've gone by if he had not interrupted them.

"Maybe we should just… figure out if you're really gonna have a baby first. I mean, like… peeing on a stick. And stuff," he suggested awkwardly. Broken out of the contest, Rachel nodded to him timidly. Quinn sighed, and followed the pair out of the apartment. Finn considered telling her to leave, but when he saw memories swimming in her eyes, he decided to let her remain in her reverie. As they reached the nearby pharmacy, Rachel hastily stuffed one test in her coat, but Quinn shook her head suddenly.

"Get two. To make sure, in case one doesn't work." Rachel pouted, and hid another box in her pocket. She stalked directly to the counter, and conspiratorially flung her items at the cashier. At James.

"Ray? Is there… something you want to tell me?," he asked worriedly. Rachel gasped, and her tears swirled down her face. James took in the troupe of followers, and nodded. "You're pregnant?"

"Well… We don't know, Jamie. And I have to find out now." She furrowed her brow apologetically, and produced a twenty dollar bill. Shaking his head, James pushed the money back at her.

"No, no. Just take them. There's a bathroom in the back." Rachel scurried past him and clicked the door shut. Her mind raced as she undid the neat packaging. How could she forget that James worked there? Squaring her shoulders, she stared at herself in the mirror.

"Everything's going to be fine," she firmly told herself. Although she would keep her baby if she was pregnant, she was still clinging to the far-away hop that she wasn't. She closed her eyes as she took the test, and didn't emerge while she waited for the results to clarify. Positive. Recklessly, she tore through to the next test. She still received the same verdict. Tearfully, she unlocked the bathroom door.

"I'm pregnant," she whispered, but no one had to strain to hear her voice. James had robotically closed the tiny pharmacy, and silence had reigned for the past hour. He jumped up as Rachel approached him, but cracked his neck, and pulled her close.

"It's all going to be okay," he cooed. "It's all going to be okay."

**A/N: Short, but did you like it? Sorry it's taken me so long to update. Review, review, review! Thanks guys!**


	10. Chapter 10

Finn had never had a weirder group of people in his apartment. Quinn was flipping through the phonebook, scouring the pages for a good pizza delivery place; James sat on the couch blankly, shell-shocked; and Rachel was curled up in her boyfriend's lap, tears staining her face. But now, two other people joined them.

"Surprise!" Kurt threw his arms in the air as the door flew open. Blaine trailed behind him, beaming. He stuck his hand out to Finn, who shook it hesitantly. "What's going on in here?," Kurt asked in disgust. "You look like you've seen a ghost." Blaine glanced around the room, concerned, but quickly returned to his happy, care-free nature.

"You won't believe what we've done!," he exploded. Everyone in the room looked up dully. Blaine was bouncing, he was so excited. "We eloped! My father would never come to our wedding, so we decided that nobody should! It's so romantic, right?" The air was silent until Rachel piped up.

"Well, I'm glad someone can have a good day." Kurt frowned, and took in the unlikely troupe of people.

"What happened? You know, I really thought you all would be happier for us." He stood with his hands on his hips, pouting. Rachel sighed.

"I apologize, Kurt and Blaine. I am happy for the both of you, really, but I've just received some hard news that I'm going to have to take some time to process." The fire in Blaine's eyes dampened.

"Is-is everything okay with you guys?"

"Rach-Rachel's pregnant." Everyone turned to stare at James. He was curled into fetal position.

"And you are?," Kurt arrogantly inquired.

"James is the father," Rachel squeaked. Finn's frown deepened. He knew that James was the father-even if he wasn't, Finn certainly wasn't either-, but he hated to think of Rachel spending the rest of her life with someone else… Just because of one night. Or day. Maybe that's why she agreed to sing Afternoon Delight with the celibacy club… She couldn't have been so prudish not to know what that really meant… Right? Kurt slowly walked to the couch and sat with Rachel.

"Have you told anyone else?" Rachel shook her head quietly, tears streaming down her face.

"She blurted it out as an excuse for stealing my fiancee," Quinn said snidely. She examined her nails, irritated with the attention Rachel was getting.

"Quinn, Rachel was one of the only people there for you when you got pregnant. Don't you think you should be being a little nicer to her?," Finn asked incredulously.

"I was playing nice, Finn. But that ended when she criticized my choice of giving Beth up for adoption."

"_She's pregnant! _Isn't that supposed to make you all… hormonal? You told me that I shouldn't take the stuff you said seriously when you were pregnant, because you didn't mean them." Quinn glared at Finn.

"Oh, trust me, I meant them. While it's true that pregnancy makes you hormonal, it also makes you bitingly honest. Maybe Rachel was exaggerating, but she still thinks I'm an awful person to some degree. Frankly, that doesn't bother me much. She's an awful person, too." For a moment, everyone just glared at Quinn, who rolled her eyes, and slung her purse over her shoulder.

"Well, Finn, if you're not going to invite me to sleep over, I'd better go get a hotel. See you when I see you," she sneered. As she slid out the door, she turned around. "Oh, and Kurt-congrats," she said sarcastically. Blaine frowned, and almost got up to punch her, but restrained himself with difficulty. As the door, slammed, Rachel whimpered.

"What am I going to do?" Her desperate cry squeaked out weakly, and Finn leaped to comfort her. James, however, was staring at Kurt and Blaine's intertwined fingers, resting on the coffee table. "James?," she called weakly as her boyfriend stood up suddenly. "What are you doing?"

"I-uh… I gotta go," James muttered.

"Why?"

"I'll tell you later… Rachel. Just, just bye." Rachel looked after him until the door pounded shut, and the sound of his retreating footsteps had faded. What was so important to him that he had to leave now? Anger flared up in Finn's chest. Why was life so unfair?


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hello all! Okay, so this story just might be finished over the course of the weekend! Yup, it's almost done… Including this one, there's three more chapters left. Enjoy! Review! I don't own Glee!**

Rachel nestled deeper into her covers as the first signs of sunlight flickered through her window. Fear shot through her. Her ringed eyes blearily blinked open, and she took in her surroundings. Soon, she would be trading them for a nursery. God, she'd screwed things up. Her life had showed so much potential… A sharp rap on her door startled her, and she felt a soft nudge on her stomach. She gasped. If there was any chance of getting an abortion, it was gone now that she knew the baby had a life! So energetic, and so early… Maybe it would be a good dancer. Rachel scurried to her door and threw it open. James! She flung her arms around his neck.

"Where have you been? I called you, like, ten times! You can't leave me like that!" Rachel looked at him with pleading in her eyes. His face was blank, as if he'd walked into a wall on his way to the dorm.

"Rachel… I-I can't do this." Rachel's face fell.

"It's hard for me, too, James, but we need to work through it all, and together-"

"No, like… I'll take care of my child, because I'm a moral man, and that's my responsibility. But when I saw your two friends-"

"Kurt and Blaine?"

"Yeah, them. I realized something that… I think I've sort of known all along." Uh-oh. Rachel knew where this was headed. She clutched her stomach in fear. He couldn't just leave her to deal with this without a support system… He wouldn't! Would he? James took a deep breath.

"Rachel," he started. "I'm gay." A tear escaped her eyes and ran down her cheek.

"Can't we… Talk about this at all? I mean, you feel what you feel, but I thought that us… What we had was real! You could be bisexual, or-"

"No, Rachel. You're a great person. You're beautiful, smart, funny, talented… But all that I've felt for you has been in a sibling way. I realize that now. i was just fooling myself. I'm not going to spend too much time fooling you. Or anyone else. I want my kid to know to be proud of who they are. That's all you've ever stood up for! I'm sorry." Rachel looked at the floor. She stared at her silly bunny slippers, her ratty dance-team sweatpants, and her shoddy Les Mis t-shirt. It was all too much. Everything. She needed to get out. Despairingly, she pushed James aside and ran out the door.

"Rachel!," he called. She didn't stop. As an afterthought, she grabbed some random jacket out off of the common room couch. The biting winter air stung her nose as she raced over the snowy grounds. It was too early for anyone to be out, so she let herself sob freely. Where was she even going? She couldn't go back home and face James. She needed… Finn. With her goal in mind, she picked up her already high speed. Trees flew past her until she reached the apartment building. She fumbled with the door knob, eyes blurred with a salty mix of tears and sweat. The second the door was open, she jogged down the hallway.

"Finn!," she called. She needed him up and ready for her. Or, at least, hoped he'd be up and ready for her. Someone had to be… She couldn't go on all alone. Not when she was pregnant. Otherwise, she probably would've given James a hug and sent him on his way to spread pride. "Finn-" a strong arm pulled her into an apartment, covering her mouth. She tried to scream, but looked into her attackers face. She let out a sigh of relief.

"Shhh, Rach… My neighbors are really mean," Finn pleaded. She smiled at him and wiped her eyes. "What's the matter?" Rachel looked at the ground as her vision began to swim again.

"James left me." Hot fire smoldered deep within Finn. How dare anyone do something like that to a pregnant woman… A pregnant Rachel! Not even Puck did that… "Well, he's still going to support our child." Finn's anger cooled a bit-but just a bit. "It's just… He's gay." Had it been anyone else, Finn would have roared in laughter, and called Puck to tell him. But now, pure shock froze him in place.

"What?"

"Apparently seeing Kurt and Blaine so happy just made him realize…" Rachel shook her head. "And I just don't know what to do," she groaned. Finn wrapped his lanky arms around her, stroking her head softly.

"Where are Kurt and Blaine?"

"They went to London," he whispered. "They wanted to stay and help you, but they made non-refundable reservations at some fancy hotel." Rachel nodded vaguely against his bare chest, and sighed.

"Finn?"

"Yeah, Rach?"

"You would have made a great father." Finn smiled. He'd heard it before, but hearing Rachel admit to it filled him with a warm feeling he couldn't describe.

"You will make a great mother. And I'll make a great… Mother's friend." Rachel giggled, and pulled back from the hug.

"I think you'll be a little more than that, Finn Hudson." She delicately leaned onto her tip-toes, centimeters away from Finn's face.

"Then I hope I'm great at that, too," he murmured.

"You will be," Rachel whispered as she closed the gap between them. Her body relaxed in his strong grip. This was how it was really meant to be. Together.


	12. Chapter 12

Finn woke to a sharp scream beside him. The baby couldn't be coming-could it? It was only three months along. He turned around, horrified, to a blood-covered Rachel. Her face was set in a tight grimace, and blood spilled over the sheets. Stupidly, he gasped.

"Rach-babe… Are-Are you okay? What's going on?" He sounded more upset than she did, and that was saying something. Trying to stay calm, Rachel grabbed his hand.

"No, no Finn, I'm fine, but… I read about this. It's-it's a miscarriage. Call James, or something."

"Are you serious? Before you go to the hospital you want to call _him? _All he's done for the baby is send you a check for $1000!" Rachel glared at Finn.

"It's still his baby," she reasoned through gritted teeth. Finn rolled his eyes, and reached for the phone. He pressed it to his ear reluctantly. The slow buzz of the ring was about to drive him insane when a groggy voice picked up.

"Hewo?" James' obviously tired monotone reached Finn's ears. He tried hard not to yell.

"It's Finn. Rachel might have had a miscarriage."

"Oh."

"Do you even care?," Finn angrily demanded.

"Well, the only reason this would be of real concern to me is my money… When do you think I could get that back?" Finn growled.

"Never, douchebag!" Rachel gave him a disappointed look as Finn flung the phone across the room.

"Now you can call the doctor," she said quietly. Finn nodded, calming down. He hobbled over to the phone, and pressed 1 on speed dial. Immediately, an operator picked up.

"Oxford Medical Office, how may I help you?" Finn smiled. Rachel had insisted upon staying in school, even going far enough to snag Finn a scholarship for performing arts. He looked at her. Silent tears streamed down her cheeks, and he reached for her hand before responding.

"My girlfriend might have had a miscarriage… Because there's, well, there's a lot of blood everywhere… And the baby's not kicking so…" The chipper woman on the other line sounded very proper and robotic as she responded,

"It does sound like it may be a miscarriage. If you could head over here as soon as possible, we'll check her out and make sure." Finn nodded, and gestured to Rachel to get dressed. She trudged sullenly to the shower, and began to wash the blood off her legs.

"We'll be there in a second."

Finn slumped in his seat, waiting for Rachel to emerge from the ultrasound. Rachel had whispered to him that 'she needed to do this herself,' so he was stuck wondering about the whole outcome. His heart raced with fear. It wasn't his baby, and it wasn't really alive, but he had grown kind of attached to it. Besides, he didn't think he could bare to see Rachel's heartbroken face if something was wrong. Not even Finn was brave enough for her puppy-dog look. Soon, he heard her quiet sobs.

Rachel curled into his lap as doctors emerged behind her. They murmured something in a low voice. Finn didn't hear the verdict, but he could guess it.

"I'm sorry, babe," he whispered into her midnight hair.

"It's okay," she replied, though it sounded like she was more convincing herself. "Now everything can happen just the way I planned it… I can stay in school, and Broadway-"

"You don't have to pretend for me." Rachel burst into hot tears at Finn's words.

"One day-when we're old, and stuff… We'll have a baby of our own. And you'll have like, a million dollars from Broadway, and I can be…" Finn considered for a moment. What would he be? "And I can be something, and our baby will be like, a perfect baby. And it'll have a cool name… Like Drizzle!" Rachel giggled into his chest, and wiped away her tears.

"I know. And really, this is for the best. But it still hurts."

Ah, and the love story was over. Rachel and Finn married soon after they graduated from Oxford, with honors. (Even Finn, surprisingly.) There were few hiccups in their relationship from that point on. Rachel made a steady salary as star of the stage, taking the lead in Spring Awakening, Rent, and various other shows. Finn became a teacher in Brooklyn, the next Mr. Schue, in a way. He loved his kids more than anything. Well, except his own family. That would be like pedophilia! With the money they earned, they decided it was time to have a little baby. And thus, Ella Genevieve Hudson was born. Aka, me. Yup. That's the ever hopeful story of my trusty parents.

In other news, Quinn is officially the assistant manager to Terri at Sheets n' Things. How that happened, no one will ever know. Blaine and Kurt adopted the most gorgeous little boy ever: Matthew Jack Anderson-Hummel. He's straight, but it was a struggle for a bit. Personally, I suspect he's bi. James is probably somewhere in England, sleeping above a pub with a transvestite. Well, that's what Dad says. Never quite got over that… THE END!

**A/N: How did you like the end of it all? I was thinking of making a story about everyone at Finn's school later, after I finish some of the other ones I have going on. I'm trying to downsize so I can update each story more efficiently. But, look out for that by checking back on my profile. I'll also try and post some other Glee fics soon… Thank you so much for all of your great reviews, and favorite-ing! You're all the best! Highflyer101**


	13. Surprise!

**A/N: Hello again, dear readers. Since all my readers have always been so loyal to me, I wanted to let you know that I am officially retiring from FanFiction so I can work with more of my own characters. I also wanted to let you know about a story I'm writing on my Wattpad account (apprenticeofathena) so that if you like the stories I've written on here, you can look into it. It's a mystery, by the way, called Politically Incorrect. Here's a summary:**

****_Stella Harvey is America's sweetheart. At least, that's what she's been told. In a tragic accident, Stella lost the past five years of her memory, meaning she doesn't remember her dad's new wife, doesn't recognize her new makeover, and certainly doesn't have the slightest clue that her dad is the President of the United States of America. In an effort to remember, Stella begins to search for clues about the five years she's missing. Clues that lead her to shocking revelations about her past and even more questions. When did Stella become popular? What happened to her life in New York? And, most importantly, was the accident really an accident?_

__**If you're interested, it would mean SO much to me if you could check it out and comment. I posted a link to my Wattpad profile on my wall and would be so honored if you would check it out. Thank-you so much guys! Obviously I've never met any of you be for, but I'm sure gonna miss you now that I'm leaving FF! Mwa, mwa! **


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